The Complicated Life

When I found out I had Parkinson's disease (PD) at the age of 45, all my hopes, plans, and dreams for the future became questionable.  I felt an incomprehensible need and immediacy to finish everything I've ever started or wanted to do.  Suddenly my life’s clock was ticking and my clock’s spring had been sprung!

I read all I could find on the internet about Parkinson’s, Young Onset of PD, Michael J. Fox, Pope John Paul II, Mohamed Ali, and others.  I joined a few web-based Parkinson’s discussion forums, and started consuming myself with all I could about different treatment options, opinions, and new “cutting edge” ideas.  Fortunately, I quickly became overwhelmed with all the scenarios and options and one day… I just stopped reading the internet, emails, blogs, and forum postings.

 

I felt confused.  I started to feel loss, lost, and cheated, which begged me to ask, “Who’s cheating me?” and “What is limiting me… right now from doing what I need to do?”  I was drawn to memories of a sailboat delivery I did a few years back.  While off the coast of Oregon, on a particularly dark, cold, sloppy, wet night, in big waves, and high winds, I realized that life is as simple or as complicated as I wanted to make it.

After battling the boat, and Mother Nature, for what was over a week of muscle punishing balance saving hand holds, sail adjustments, tiller/rudder pulling and pushing, and grabbing anything that would keep me up right and safe and from being thrown off the bucking sail boat, I had a moment of clarity.  It seemed that the more I “gave” into the boat’s motion and accepted the boat’s movement through the waves, the less energy I actually had to expend and the easier and more solid I felt “with” the boat.

That memory led me to the realization that there are many “things” in my life that are not important to “my” life.  While at sea, I felt no pull to “do” anything other than to “be” where I was and to focus on the moment I was in.  In removing the static of life’s conversations, appointments, obligations, and ambitions, the roiling and angry water took on a more organized and wonderful feel.  The boat felt strong and healthy, the wind became almost musical, my spirits picked up and I felt stronger, more alert and sharper than I had in weeks.
  

The wind and waves were no longer randomly trying to sink the boat, I felt a sort of harmony with the elements, and actually started to “sail” the boat rather than “fight” the boat.  My gloomy night of cold rain, blustery wind, and big cresting waves, became filled with the sounds of waves, wind, and the phosphorescent glow of the breaking waves.  When I reacted to the sea’s conditions, I noticed that if I made a small course correction based on the conditions the boat began to sail downwind much more responsively and easily although on a slightly different course.

In short, what obstacles or challenges have I placed in my course through life?  What limiters do I own?  Parkinson’s is now something that I own.  I feel Parkinson’s was given to me as a reminder to spend my time more wisely, more compassionately, and to be more mindful of where I am, and what I am doing, and how impermanent and tentative the “things” in and of life really are.  When I remember to let go and “be” in the moment, or “be” with someone, or “do” what I can when I am able to, I find a sense of peace in the uncomplicated nature of just “being”.

I am retired now.  I still use a schedule to plan my daily activities and my obligations.  I try to visit, or call, someone new each week.  I try to go to the gym every day in my quest to keep my health as strong as possible.   I consciously choose to stay with the people living life rather than the people grinding through life.  While course changes are difficult for me to make at times, I realize that my life can be made easier by giving up my wants and accepting giving into the moment and accepting the outcome.

Complications in my life are always born of emotional choices in which I’ve had to choose between two things that I selfishly want.  I know I can do without either one of the choices, and if I actually visualize and accept my life without those “things”, only then can I truly enjoy not choosing either item and enjoy whichever one, if any, I receive.  I “give” up, so that I can “receive” which uncomplicates my life immeasurably.

Have a nice day.   Campy out!

Medical Marijuana

This is such an historically emotional issue. 

Lets face it, present day gang activity in drug trafficking and drug murders is terrible and such a waste. Our jails are filled with repeat marijuana users costing the tax payers millions each year.  Images of "Pot" being used to "party" at Woodstock, coupled with Cheech and Chong evoke a certain madness about 60's and 70's and the use of "dope" to get "high".  Even our beloved Presidents Clinton, Bush, and Obama, the actual protectors of that very bedrock document of Democracy on which we have chosen to base our freedom, have used marijuana to get "high".  Prohibition in the 1920's and the ensuing government campaign against marijuana have been pretty successful at getting the word out... "Marijuana is Bad for Americans!"

My issue and biggest concern is "where" the "medical marijuana" comes from.  At the age of 48, I have been dealing with Parkinson's Disease for nearly 15 years and Dysautonomia for the past two.  I don't take medical treatments lightly, as "my" routine is particular to "my" disease process and whether or not I will have a day spent on the couch or a day spent among people enjoying life. 

I have spent a fair amount of time legitimately and aggressively seeking medication based and surgical (brain surgery) treatments, as well as Prayer, laying on of hands, massage, Reiki, Yoga, and diet modifications to mention a few, in an effort to relieve, not cure, my daily experience with the symptoms of Parkinson's and Dysautonomia.

I hope that some day I will get a legitimate chance to try safe, medical grade, and guilt free marijuana, in an attempt to relieve at least one of my many physical symptoms that are not only a result of the unstoppable neurological deterioration of Parkinson's disease and Dysautonomia, but also are the result of side effects of Deep Brain Stimulation surgery and the medicines I and others like me dependent on daily.

Some days, "Hope" is the only line I have in the water of life at the age of 48.  I "hope" that compassion, kindness, generosity, and clear minds, prevail over a long standing history of misinformed however well intentioned law makers in my future.

Peace to you all.

Campy

The Campanelli gluten free/dairy free diet

The Campanelli gluten free/dairy free diet

First, let’s start off with what I am no longer eating or cooking with.

No butter, no milk, no cheese of any type from a cow.

No wheat, rye, barley, spelt, hydrolyzed protein, or any malt, or flour made from these items.

No breads, to include, white, wheat, marble, rye, bagels, muffins, English muffins, croissants, buns, scones, and yes pizza dough.

No cereals, to include; cream of wheat, frosted flakes, cornflakes, Cheerios, any cereal that includes the above grains in its ingredients.

No breaded and fried meats such as chicken nuggets, chicken fried steak, some French fries, in essence anything that has been dredged through flour or wheat.

Hotdogs, sausages, and deli meats may have additives known as fillers in them such as barley and wheat products so again, beware of and read the ingredients list.

No beer!

Cookies, cake mixes, preprocessed foods, boxed rice, couscous, fast foods, soups with creamy sauces, and soups in general.  Be sure to read the labels and be on watch for wheat or barley based thickeners.

Now for the fun part, let’s begin with what we are eating:

Start out by reading the label; if it says 100% gluten-free on it, it's good!  There's usually a gluten-free diet area in most stores. Gluten-free bread called “Udi” brand bread is usually found in the freezer.  I’ve also had good results finding gluten-free snack bars, bread sticks, and other bread snack replacements.

Corn and rice-based cereals are good to go (just watch for malt) and any wheat, barley, rye, or spelt ingredients.  Buckwheat is good as well. 

Rice noodles and quinoa noodles go good with pastas so long as breadcrumbs and cheese are used in the meatballs.  I've been using cornmeal lately with Italian spices which works fine.

Rice cakes, popcorn, potatoes, polenta, millet, Wine and liquors are on the okay list!

I've been using oatmeal and gluten-free / dairy free pancake mix as well.

Instead of using milk, I've had good results mixing goat yogurt with hemp milk and egg whites. Sometimes I'll mix canola oil and applesauce with the hemp milk or goat yogurt depending on what I’m making.  I know it sounds kind of weird, doesn't it?

Anything made with rice flour, potato flour, potato starch, and coconut milk is good to go.

Marshmallows, gumdrops, hard candy, almonds, raisins, fresh fruit, humus, and any custom-made gluten-free cakes and pies or bread are good to go.

Eggs, fruits, vegetables, organic peanut butter, almond butter, cashew butter are good.

Quinoa (KEENWAH), gluten-free oats, gluten-free cornmeal and gluten-free soy preparations are also cool.

To make things as simple as possible, we've been eating a lot of Asian food so long as it isn't breaded and fried, Italian food is difficult because there's so much cheese and bread incorporated into the ingredients, however it is doable and quite tasty to make at home. Fresh meat and vegetables, non-creamy or butter/flour based soups have been working fine.

Don't go crazy buying lots of stuff because we get there and we'll figure it out and maybe cook some real good stuff that you've not had before.